Of Birds, if not Bees
by The Ferryman
Summary: Canary's trial prompts Ethan to explain some of the facts of cape-life to Rory.


Worm is owned by John C. 'Wildbow' McCrae

* * *

Ethan stalked across the Protectorate-only lounge on the Rig, snapped up the remote, and muted the television. "Want to tell me again how great our judicial system is, Puppy; and how everyone who goes to the Birdcage deserves it?"

Jocelyn calmly ignored the bait and after a moment her husband sighed.

"You aren't planning on doing something…unfortunate, are you, Ethan?"

"Like pulling Madcap out of retirement?" Ethan asked, not looking at the other woman in the lounge. "I thought you knew me better than that, Hannah."

"I _do_ know you better than that, Ethan," she said. "That's why I asked."

Now Ethan looked at her and, after a moment, seemed to deflate. "No," he said, "I'm thoroughly heroized now. That's why I'm going to sit on my ass and bitch about it instead of actually doing anything of substance."

Hannah winced at the sour bitterness directed more in helpless fury at the situation than any condemnation of her.

"You _know_ Madcap?" asked the fourth person in the lounge. "When? How? Why didn't you ever bring him in?"

"Rory—" Jocelyn began.

"Classified," Hannah interrupted.

"No," Ethan said in turn.

"Ethan—"

"My story, Hannah," he said. "It's not like I can't share it with whoever I want."

The other hero sighed and nodded reluctantly.

Ethan turned. "I didn't used to know Madcap, Rory. I used to _be_ Madcap. Then Puppy tracked me down and taught me the true meaning of Christmas."

"Something like that," Jocelyn murmured dryly.

"But…" Rory's mouth opened and closed twice. "Why keep it a secret? I mean, that's hell of a win story for the Protectorate."

"It's the same reason why Puppy and I are in this shithole of a city," Ethan said without any of his usually humor. "It's, as you pointed out, a success story for the _Protectorate_. The PRT? Not so fucking much. If I had my way, fuck—if _Legend_ had his way it would be out there, and I'd give my very honest and not-at-all-Kosher opinion about the Birdcage every time a reporter asked. But we don't get our way. The Protectorate is Costa-Brown's little yappy dog and if we are smart we perform whatever tricks she wants us to perform, if and when—and _only_ if and when—she wants us to perform them. And in this case it's keeping my past affiliation quiet. The Protectorate gets another hero, the PRT doesn't get shit flung at its image, and I give a blathering 'no opinion' when a reporter asks me about the Birdcage."

"Baumann exists for a reason," Rory said.

"Suuuure," Ethan said. "And if we were only talking about capes like Acidbath I might even believe you. Have you ever wondered why capes like me and Shadow Stalker get a go in the Protectorate, Wards, whichever, and Canary doesn't even get an offer?"

Rory shook his head.

"It's because Costa-Brown finds us _useful_. Capes willing to fight other capes on command and willing to get killed by Endbringers? Useful. Even if they've got a body count. Even if they helped break capes with body counts out of prison...or on their way to the Birdcage. Sometime when I am very, very drunk, get me to tell you how many additional murders have happened because I helped keep people _out_ of that…oubliette.

"Capes that just want to live their life, maybe make things a little better without getting sucked into this…obscene parody of cops and robbers? They aren't useful to Costa-Brown. Not as capes in the Protectorate. So she _made_ Canary useful. It lets her chip away at the restrictions on the Birdcage, and helps build up a politician—excuse me, a _prosecutor_—who will remember this favor later on. Something to frighten people with." Ethan waggled his fingers. "'Oooh, look at the scary parahuman! Only the PRT can keep you safe!'"

He dropped his hand, and his voice was harsh as it lost its mocking tone. "Used to be you needed three strikes to get the Birdcage even _mentioned_. Bodies. Not just three bodies, but bodies on three different occasions. That was to get the 'cage brought up as a talking point. The capes that were dropped in there… Blake Kaze's death toll is high enough to be a statistic. String Theory wanted to deorbit the _moon_."

"Ethan!" Hannah snapped.

"Sorry," Ethan said, sounding remarkably unapologetic. "Rory, forget I told you that. Not for public consumption. My point is, the rules about who can go in have been slipping for years. Now we're at the point of Birdcaging a person for what, one count of negligent assault with a parahuman ability?"

"Can you blame them? Masters are scary," Rory said.

"Right," Ethan nodded, "so we should send Dean to the Birdcage next. Preventive custody. Masters are scary."

"Dean hasn't done anything wrong," Rory objected. "For that matter, he's a great example of the good a Master can do."

Ethan continued nodding. "Which is, of course, why the PRT has encouraged PHO speculation about his Tinker specialty, and has pointedly _not_ updated his PHO-wiki page about his Master ability. _Great_ example."

"Maybe you should run a patrol," Hannah said evenly. "Work some of that energy off."

Ethan stared back at her. "Maybe I should."

After a moment he shook his head to glare at the still-muted television screen. "And I thought they couldn't get lower than Knot," he muttered before storming out.

"Not?" Rory asked.

Jocelyn and Hannah traded looks.

"Knot was Birdcaged for multiple counts of murder last year," Hannah said.

"Oh, right, the one with the fancy ropework powers?" Rory said.

"What didn't make it into the news is that Knot is a Case 70," Jocelyn said. "Two parahumans that, after triggering, share a singular body. Like every other example, they _were_ identical twins before triggering. In this case, twin brothers, Adam and Douglas."

"Adam was shaken as a baby, Rory," Hannah said tiredly. "Before he triggered he had the mental capacity of an eighty-year-old...and was the one most likely to have actually committed the crimes."

"And the other one?" Rory asked. "Douglas?"

"What about him?" Jocelyn asked.

"That's…" Rory made the face. "You mean Assault is some kind of precog? That he knew in advance how bad the Birdcage would go and was trying to undermine it?"

"Hah!" Jocelyn barked a laugh. "No. I'm sure he'd like the idea, but… I know it was personal, but I've never asked. And I know he hasn't used his access as Assault to look up the case file."

"He hasn't?" Hannah didn't try to keep the surprise out of her voice.

Jocelyn shrugged. "It came up during our discussion with Legend when he agreed to join the Protectorate. One he destroys childhood memories he holds dear, the other confirms he's working for the people who…destroyed someone's life. Possibly both."

The three heroes sat morosely as the silent television continued to splash color into the lounge.

"Well fuck," Rory said.

Jocelyn stood. "I don't know what game Costa-Brown is playing. I agree with Ethan, though, in that I very much doubt she cares about the Protectorate at least so long as it doesn't undermine whatever her goals are. I'm just grateful we have people like Legend and Alexandria who understand that being a hero _means_ something." She slipped Battery's hood back into place. "Hannah, I'll see you later. Assault shouldn't patrol alone right now."


End file.
